Lesbian mothers

fight discrimination

By Ann Reisfeld

Special to The Plain Dealer

NEW YORK Although motherhood and lesbianism seem contradictory, one sociologist estimates that a third of all American lesbians are mothers.

Most of these women try to conceal the fact that the categories overlap, because as females, single parents and gays, they would be triply oppressed, according to a paper prepared for the American Sociological Association convention that met here.

Sociologist Mildred D. Pagelow, of the University of California at · Riverside, who is the author of the paper, based her conclusions on indepth interviews with lesbian mothers who are single, divorced or widowed. By comparing the responses with those of single heterosexual mothers, she found that lesbians with children face greater discrimination in three major areas: child custody, housing and employment.

"The most crucial point in their lives," the author said, is the time when decisions about their children's custody are being made. If their sexual preference is known, it

may influence the court in its judgment of which parent is more "fit."

The only gay mothers who are not threatened with losing a child are those whose husbands have abandoned them and those who never married the child's father in the first place, she said.

Most of the women interviewed said they preferred to be open with their children, particularly if they share their homes with their female lovers.

But most said they were compelled to hide the truth from their parents because they feared their families, "as devout Christians," would feel obligated to remove the grandchildren from an "evil influence." Consequently, visits from relatives prompt such maneuvers as rearrangement of clothing in closets, and furniture in bedrooms.

In contrast, heterosexual mothers said a live-in male lover contributed stability to their lives.

Housing was also found to be a matter of constant tension. Twenty per cent of the gay mothers said they had been evicted from rented homes. "Charges of lesbianism were either spoken or implied" in the incidents, the report said.